Midweek: Sad But Not Deceived

In Matthew 19:16-22, Jesus is approached by a young man of great wealth. Maybe you know the story. The young man calls Jesus "Good Teacher." Matthew's account, unlike the others in Mark and Luke, seems to place our focus on the "good" thing. "What good thing must I do that I may have eternal life?" Performance, right? My end goal is to be good. Perhaps that is how such a young man acquired his riches. Maybe, from a father who taught him the value of a hard day's work, of being the best and most fruitful. Nevertheless, Jesus questions this prosperous young man's use of the word "good," and proceeds to break it down for him. It's more than checking off boxes, following the letter of the Law. The Law was given to show you where you lack. You must have enough compassion for others, selflessness and humility in your obedience to God, disregard for your own ambitions and your own way, and longing for the eternal, that you are willing to give everything to follow Me. (paraphrase mine) Charles Gore, in his book, The Sermon on the Mount, says the poverty to which Jesus called this young man is a call to detachment. Each Gospel writer, in his account, tells us plainly, the young man went away sad at hearing this because he had many possessions. He turned his back on the Salvation of God because his way of living, his treasure was where his heart was. What no Gospel writer says is that Jesus, feeling so hurt by the young man's rejection, ran after him to pull him back. What no Gospel writer says is that Jesus, so in love with this young man, changed the rules so he could have eternal life. What no Gospel writer says is that Jesus is more interested in happy followers than obedient followers.

Our society puts such value on happy. We love inclusion. We want peace at any cost and pale at the thought of offending someone. Jesus wanted this young man, and every person who overheard this exchange, and every person throughout history who reads these words, to be sad, if necessary, but not deceived. Happiness is no more the end goal than good works and being good. Inclusion is no more the end goal than performance. Peace is no more the end goal than the letter of the Law. Jesus, Jesus is the end goal, following Him alone in full obedience and to completion. 

Does Jesus want joyful people? Certainly. Does He want inclusion? It is not His desire that any should perish. Does He want peace? He is the Prince of Peace. But never at the cost of truth. To seek those things first is to sacrifice Truth for something less than. Jesus is the Truth, and He will not withhold His character to spare someone's feelings. He is the only Way, and He will not provide another for the sake of convenience. Jesus is the Divine Judge, appointed by the Father, and will not spare anyone the truth just to keep the peace. To allow someone to be deceived is not mercy or righteousness. It does not signal to everyone you are acting in that person's best interest. To stand quietly as someone walks away sad, excluded, or outraged but knowing truth, is an act of perfect love. 

Find Your Groom Before You Find Your Husband

Wife, ex-wife, mom, stepmom, and grandmother here. That in and of itself says I have lived, I have loved, and I have made plenty of mistakes. And, while the living and loving have definitely been the most enjoyable part of the journey, it is the mistakes that have taught me the most. That being said, the weightiest, most wholly beneficial advice I can give any single woman is:

  Find your Groom before you find your husband.

My first marriage took place at twenty-one. A great guy. He had goals. He worked hard toward those goals. His family was stable. I was not a great person: I married him for all the wrong reasons, had no real goals of my own, never discussed with him any sort of goals for "us", and couldn't recognize stability with a photo ID. But when he was around, I was 110% his. I dropped everything and everyone for him. The problem? The converse was equally true: when he was not around, I was not his; I dropped him and all thoughts of him. I betrayed him when he was gone as easily as I betrayed others when he was present. Being self-aware is vastly different from being self-absorbed. I was not self-aware.

My second serious relationship took place shortly thereafter. Not such a great guy. I'll leave it at that. But I had learned. I would never hurt someone like I had hurt my first husband. This man had my undying loyalty. Not until he threatened the safety of someone I infinitely loved, did It ever occur to me to defy him. But defy him I did. I spent years paying for it personally and know the pain of watching those I love pay for my bad judgment and selfishness. My undying loyalty to the wrong type of person may have provided something for me in the short term but ultimately brought forth death.

My second marriage might have begun as a beautiful step toward redemption, but redemption as it exists in the natural is inadequate at its very best. Lessons had been learned by both of us (it was his second marriage as well). My career path was taking shape. "Adulting" had begun: a house, cars, children. For a time, it was picture perfect. But the integrity of a snapshot is limited by time and a lack of context. And it was time that began to reveal the context of our relationship. I was still incredibly dependent on the affirmation of others, as was he. I sought that affirmation within our marriage; he chose other avenues. When our relationship ended in an explosion of rational thought and unshakeable boundaries, I swore I'd be by myself forever. Well, not really "by myself."

In the interim, I'd found my Groom. Marriage, the union of one man to one woman, is our picture of Jesus Christ (the Groom) calling His people, the Church (His Bride), to be one with Him. In Genesis 2:24, God declares "a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh." In the same way, those who would be followers of Christ, His Church, are to be one with Him. He calls us and woos us, showing us His character through creation and His goodness to us. He demands we forsake all others for Him. He draws us to Himself for the purpose of transforming our lives to bring Him glory. (Does that sound narcissistic to you? Well, if you hold the perfect, infinitely good Creator to the same standard you hold your father or high school principal, perhaps. But if I'm going to serve anyone --and we all serve someone in this life --I'm going to serve the One who is worthy and loves me enough to die for me.)  He leads us and guides us in the way which we should go. He loves His Bride with an everlasting love. Protector, Provider, Defender, Friend, Teacher. This is the picture of a perfect Husband. This is the foundation for a perfect relationship. And though no mere mortal after this would measure up, meeting the one who desired and pledged and worked to emulate my Groom, was a blessing beyond blessings. 

Marriage Number Three. Don't get me wrong, I do not advocate divorce or multiple marriages. However, my relationship with the Lord was still taking form when Scott and I met. I was still attempting to maintain boundaries, to obey, and to resist this persistent, very interesting and tender man. So, there we were, both fumbling our way through the newness of new life. And we've been at it ever since. But finding my Groom has made all the difference. When my husband fails, I seek my Groom so I might forgive. When my husband confronts me about wrong I have done, I seek my Groom so I might humbly accept correction and seek reconciliation. When my husband and I want two very different things, I seek my Groom for wisdom. When my husband is all I dreamed he might be, I seek my Groom to express gratitude for the radical change in each of us that has brought about such blessing. My husband is my partner, my friend, my special blessing; but my Groom is our foundation. Without Jesus, I might be a good wife; with Him, I can be a godly wife. Without Him, I might be happy; with Him I am whole. My Groom is making me the best Bride I can be. For His glory and for the good of my husband and me. 

Whose Flag Are You Flying?

It's the end of May as I write. I am really hoping the month of June will not be the stage for mental illness and debauchery it has been for the past few years. I am really hoping rainbows and LGBTQIA+ flags will not adorn every company logo and city structure known to man. Not because I have no love for that community, not because I have anything against rainbows or flags, but because the flagrant in-your-face campaign that has been encouraged in the past is uncalled for. It's between you and your Creator if you act on your temptation to sin. It's between you and your Creator if you believe He's made some terrible mistake. It's between you and your Creator if you wanna dis His sign of promise. But when you hijack our government buildings, our parks and roadways, our libraries, our schools, and our churches with your personal problems, I take issue. I also take issue with the administrators of those spaces who allow you to hijack them. And, as a believer, I take particular issue with the stewards of God's sheep, buildings, and Word who have allowed --No! not just allowed but encouraged this wickedness. I hope you do, too. 

My family is of European descent. They come from Ireland, Scotland, England, Wales, Germany, Switzerland, etc., etc. I can't walk into my church with a Union Jack or a German flag and not expect someone to question my motives. What are you trying to say? What are you trying to prove? And quite honestly, I can't think of any motive besides drawing attention to myself in the House of God that would cause me to carry the flag of another country. Even the American flag --though it stands proudly at the front of our place of worship, it stands to remind us of the blessing of our country. It reminds us we are in a place that allows us to worship the One True God, to read His Word aloud and as led by the Spirit. It reminds us we are free to assemble in the name of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. But even if I were to hoist it high and march down the aisle during the time of offering, someone would --I pray --snag me before I got past the second row and say, "Put the flag away, please. It could be a distraction. We are here to worship God."

We are here to worship God. As believers, we are not here to celebrate sin, to coddle apostate hearts, or to allow the perversion of His Word and His promises. We are His ambassadors. His is the only flag we should fly. Loyalty and obedience to God over any other, over every other loyalty. Yet, many American churches have caved to championing the flag of the LGBTQIA+. If it's about making them feel welcome, why are there not flags of other countries? Italians welcome here! Why are there not flags of other states? Missourians welcome here! Why are there not flags of organizations? Marines, or Olympians, or Boy Scouts welcome here! It's a ridiculous effort at being relevant. And God will judge it. God does not need His people to compromise His holiness in order to win souls. The preaching of the early Apostles was fire and brimstone, and thousands were saved at a time. In a culture that fed converts to lions! Scriptures condemn drawing attention to ourselves for any other reason but to draw attention to the God we serve, the God worthy of glory. So, whose flag are you flying? I pray it is His and His alone.

Midweek: NKJV Personal Size Reference Bible & Journal Set

This week I've had the opportunity to look at Thomas Nelson's NKJV Personal Size Reference Bible and Journal Set. The complimentary set I received came in a protective sleeve, bound in a rich purple Leathersoft™. The covers of both books are stitched and embossed in a beautiful, matching design, and the pages of each are gilded in silver, perfectly complementing the covers. Thomas Nelson stands behind this Bible with their lifetime guarantee. The retail value is $59.95, but Amazon is currently selling the set for $37.33.

The Bible is basic in nature: no commentaries, introductions to books, timelines, charts, or Bible survey. There are eight full-color maps and a concordance. Other Bible features include:

• Verse-style Scripture format starts each verse on its own line so it’s easy to navigate the text
• End-of-verse cross-references help you to find related passages quickly and easily
• Words of Christ in red help you quickly identify Jesus’ teachings and statements
• Line-matched text for improved clarity when reading
• Portable personal-size edition allows this Bible to be a perfect travel companion wherever you go
• Durable and flexible Smyth-sewn binding allows the Bible to lay flat wherever you are reading
• Two Ribbon markers make it easy navigate and keep track of where you are reading
• Easy-to-read extra-large 10.5-point NKJV Comfort Print® (The concordance, however, is printed in a much smaller font.)

Journal features include:

• Matching cover and design
• 224 pages of lined space for recording your insights, study notes, and prayers
• Ribbon marker

Personally, I think it's a beautiful set. If I had one criticism, however, it would be with regard to the Bible: the pages are thin and would not support gel pens, most highlighters, and probably many pens without bleeding. Overall, though, both the Bible and journal are elegant in appearance but very functional. The simple design and text of the Bible make it a suitable carry Bible; the sturdy, lined pages of the journal are without ornament, leaving plenty of room for actual journaling. A journal of this quality, purchased on its own, would probably cost anywhere between $10-$15. The set for its current price is a terrific value and would make a lovely gift.