Several years ago, a coworker helped her daughter pack up a tiny, fuel-efficient, affordable car, and sent her on her way to a university several hours from their home. It was the day of which they had both dreamed. My coworker had worked extra hours and saved to help her daughter reach for the stars; her daughter had studied hard, getting good grades and working to receive scholarships. All to lay hold of their dream. In the weeks that followed, her daughter struggled. Classes, relationships, living arrangements, even the foods which now were a part of her life were unfamiliar and unwelcoming. Additionally, she'd been victim to bullying in her dorm, bullying that invaded and corrupted what was supposed to be her safe space, her study space, her space for pleasant social interactions. This young woman was so hurt, so alone, and so discouraged; her mental and physical health began to decline. At the end of the first semester, my coworker jumped in her car, drove to that university, withdrew her daughter, packed her up, and brought her home. My heart broke for them both. I thought of them as I was reading John 3 the other day.
For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. ~ John 3:16
If you're of a certain age, you might right now be picturing the guy in the rainbow wig with the John 3:16 sign. Or you might be thinking of a football player known for painting John 3:16 in eye black on his cheeks. Whatever it is, take a moment, get those things out of your head and then, let's look at this verse with fresh perspective. There is much more to learn here than just what is written in black and white.
For one, God's love. We are so loved. Well, of course, the verse says that. But not just "so loved" as a child spreads his arms and declares, I love you thiiiis much! We are loved in depth, in weight, and in this manner. We are loved with a love that only a perfectly just, perfectly merciful, perfectly mighty God who is Himself love, can love. What we have here on earth, even the best examples --the cute little couple married sixty-five years who still hold hands and give each other adoring glances, the mother who cradles and weeps unconsolably over her stillborn child --a child whose voice she never heard or smile she never got to see, the doctor who leaves a profitable practice and treats communicable diseases in remote parts of the world --these examples pale in comparison to the love of Love. We are loved in this manner: God gave His child, gave Himself, and that Child laid down His life willingly so that those who mock Him, despise Him, reject Him, defy Him might never say they were not given opportunity, might never be without opportunity to live in His love forever. His love for us knows no bounds and is demonstrated by incalculable sacrifice.
Homesickness. Jesus, God's Son, left the heavenly realm in exchange for homelessness, persecution, sickness, the human frailty and limitations of growing up in this world under the authority of humanly frail and limited parents; He left His throne room for a front row seat to the jealousy of power-hungry elites who deceived the people He so loved, and being imbedded in enemy territory, surrounded by sin and those not yet reconciled to God, He walked among the sick and demon-possessed. Imagine how homesick He would become; but God the Father gave, and God the Son obeyed in full.
Hurt. "...that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life." His life, given in exchange for us. His Father watched and grieved the punishment of One that many would be made righteous; the only sufficient Sacrifice, that mankind might be reconciled with the God from Whom sin had separated us. Jesus was betrayed and abandoned, beaten and bruised, slandered and humiliated, stripped and spat on, ultimately suffocating on a cross, a symbol of the world's judgment. In my place. In your place. Unimaginable physical and mental anguish.
Death. Of course, John 3:16 mentions death: those who believe do not perish. But what is not specifically noted is that Jesus died in body that we might live in spirit; Jesus was resurrected as the Firstfruits of many; a promise, a guarantee that we will be resurrected as well. Jesus knew death as no one else has, and He understands the death of relationships, the death of a loved one, the death of a dream.
As I mentioned, years have passed. My former coworker's daughter has embraced a new dream: marriage and motherhood, and she is thriving! We parents want to protect our children from the terrible and the painful; we want them to be courageous and go as far as their imaginations will take them --so long as things work out and they don't get hurt. But we can't always be there; we can't always ride in and pull them out. The greatest thing we can do is encourage them and pray them toward a relationship with a loving, sacrificial, relatable Savior God; One who carries us through those tougher times, those days we are homesick and hurting, those days when we watch our dreams die, those days when the love of God seems to be not so so. As your children begin to prepare for another school year, do not neglect prayer, do not neglect those times of easy conversation about the God of John 3:16, the God who loves so, the God who understands, the God who will be with them forever.

Photo Courtesy Steven Ganski, Jr.