A Marriage Made in Heaven

After a night of tossing, turning, kicking, and shoving, I was ready to show my husband the inside of a pine box. Okay, maybe not a pine box, but definitely alternate sleeping accommodations. We'd reserved a room with two Queen beds for a recent trip we made. Normally, sleeping in an unfamiliar place in a bed smaller and less made-to-order than ours at home makes things a little uncomfortable, but this night was exceptionally torturous. By early morning, I'd grown so tired of hugging the edge of the bed and still being pushed and prodded, when Scott made an attempt to move my arm one last time, I resisted with all I had yet continued to feign sleep. Eventually he capitulated and I listened intently as he readjusted. Once I was sure he was settled...Five...Four...Three...Two...One...I pulled my arm back, far to my side of the bed. Aaaaah, the revenge was sweet!

When less than an hour later, the grey light of a rainy morning began creeping through the window, I decided I'd had enough. I quietly dressed, grabbed my books, and headed outdoors to have my quiet time with Jesus. As I read my morning Scriptures, I realized the relationship I want with Jesus is the relationship I have with my husband. Yes, he drives me crazy. No, I don't always agree with him. And, obviously, we have our issues. But there is absolutely no one else I'd rather do life with. I don't look at other men. I don't look at other couples and think, "They seem so much happier than we are." I don't wake up in the morning and say, "Alright, well, let me go do this hard thing called marriage." Times are difficult and things certainly don't always go as we'd like, but we are in this for better or for worse. We are one. 

Oh, how I long to say that about my Savior and me! Most times I'm trying to get things right or focused on how wrong I've gotten them instead of enjoying our relationship. While I'm looking in the fridge, seeing what's been provided, and planning meals my husband will enjoy around what's available, it's an entirely different approach in my relationship with my Lord. With Jesus, I tend to whine. Here's what I don't have. Why can't I do this? I'm not just calmly, quietly, gratefully using what I have to please Him, but rather taking the approach that if I had this or that, I'd be better equipped to bring an offering. Do I think He doesn't know what's in "the fridge???"

Then there are the sleeping arrangements. Before we head off to bed, Scott and I usually enjoy some downtime together. He watches television while I read, or we choose something to watch or read together. It's a team sport, and I enjoy these moments together, when the business of the day has been laid aside. But my relationship with Jesus is not like this. I'm busy, busy, busy. Take the time to sit quietly in His presence?! Who will do the dishes or plan the week's events? I can't just sit. What will I do when I sit? Okay, maybe I'll sit for a bit...after I do this one thing. What sort of relationship is that? It's the winding down, the quiet, the stillness that brings my husband and I together. If I ever wonder why I don't have the relationship with Jesus that I have with Scott, perhaps that is why --I've not acquiesced to His command to rest.

And it is in those moments when I am 100%, undeniably, comfortably human, uniquely me, that I am most grateful for Scott. Of all the people I know, he has loved me best, most honestly, most patiently, most intimately. I have failed him and felt terrible that I failed him; I have asked for forgiveness and been moved to never do "that" again. But I've not tip-toed around, or presented some false self to him, or continued to bring up my infraction or my resolve to avoid it in the future; I get back in the race (or confess my clandestine plot for revenge), and we move on. As great as my husband is, however, how can I not allow the forgiveness and grace of my perfect Savior to envelop me the same way? How can I not know that He loves me even more than my husband --all of me, the 4AM vengeful me, the trying to get things right me, the self-pitying me, the whining me, the hurried and deflecting me? How can I think that He wants anything but for me to get back in the race, confess my lack, and move on with Him leading the way? How can I think my Groom wants His bride to be anything other than one with Him?

   

Midweek: What Do You Want from Jesus?

As we read the Gospels, the portrait of Jesus that unfolds is one of a gentle, compassionate man and a mighty, sovereign God. To give more weight to His humanity than His divinity is to have an inaccurate picture of Jesus the Christ, our Lord. As we seek Him today, may we seek all of Him. May we long to know Him fully and accurately, not simply chasing, as some have, after those things with which we hope He will provide us. Shusaku Endo, in his work, A Life of Jesus, captures the limitations of such a search:

The copious miracle stories in the Synoptic Gospels as well as in John bring home to us the sad fact that the crowd sought nothing more than the threadbare question of whether Jesus did or did not perform the miracles. Behind these miracle stories we sense the lonely figure of Jesus himself, standing quietly in the crowd of people demanding nothing but corporeal wonders.

Jesus did not reject these kinds of sick and crippled people. On the contrary, the Gospels clearly relate how with his disciples he went to the valley of the lepers, whom other people detested, and how he visited the hovel of a man who suffered the agonies of malaria. The lepers in those days used to shave their heads, they wore distinctive dress, and they were put away at a distance from any towns or villages. They called out a warning when anybody approached. Jesus walked through the mountain coves and the gullies where these forsaken lepers were forced to live. He wanted to restore their healthy bodies. He wanted to restore to the blind the use of their eyes. He wanted to make the lame walk. He wanted to bring back a lost child to a bereaved mother.

But a look of sadness came to his eyes when he could not do it. He held the hand of a leper, or a lame man, and he pleaded earnestly his desire to take upon himself their misery and pain. He asked for a share in their suffering, a chance to be partners with them. But the lepers and the cripples were hoping only to be healed. They came pleading to Jesus: "Cure us! Cure us!"

What are we to make of these exclamations of Jesus, which the Gospels have left us along with the miracle narratives? "You seek for a sign, but no sign shall be given except the sign of the sign of the prophet Jonah" (Matthew 12:39). "Why does this generation ask for a sign?" (Mark 8:12). "Unless you see signs and wonders you will not believe" (John 4:48). "Blessed are those who have not seen me and yet believe" (John 20:29). 

The realistic pathos in these words of Jesus, preserved for us in the Gospels, comes from the fact that the people appearing before him were looking not for "love" but for signs and wonders. They wanted only quick and tangible benefits.

~ Shusaku Endo

A Life of Jesus

Celebrating Your Role in the Kingdom

'tis the season! Sweater Weather! Pumpkin Spice everything. Colors galore. 🍁 It's like a party in nature. Has the party started? Yes, it has. Are we surrounded by the party, immersed in the gala? Yes, we are. Do the cares and burdens of our day, the plate glass windows of the offices and classrooms in which we are stuck bring the party to a halt? Nope, they just prevent us from enjoying it.

Matthew 4:17. Jesus preaches the simplest of messages: Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand. I was listening to Dallas Willard's lecture series, Divine Conspiracy, posted on YouTube. He emphasizes the presence of the Kingdom of God (or Heaven) right here, right now. The rule of God is now, immediately available for us to live in. Now. Immediately. Willard likened Jesus' words, at hand, to a student showing another around campus. They are heading to the auditorium, and the student leading the way says, "Turn here, the auditorium is at hand." There is not a future turn referenced, but an immediate one. The auditorium is not days or miles away but is present. Turn immediately, the auditorium is immediate. 

In the first part of Jesus' message, He says "repent." The Greek word used is metanoeo. It means to change your thinking from what you thought before; to reconsider your previous considerations. Jesus didn't preach, Change your behavior, for the kingdom of heaven is here. Jesus knows it is our thoughts that determine our behavior. If we think there is no other way to provide for our family but to do something illegal, that is what we will do. If we think there is no truth to be found, we will live in a way that is without hope and, perhaps, without restraint. But(!) if we think, believe, abide in the message Christ preached, we will treat our neighbors differently (Eph. 4:32), treat our bodies differently (1 Cor. 10:31), love Jesus differently (Jn. 14:15). If I believe my job every morning is to reign with Christ, as His ambassador and as such, to bestow on everyone I meet the grace and goodness of the Kingdom of God, to bring heaven to earth in as many ways as I am able, I won't sit around licking my wounds or feeding my ego all day. I will join the party! I will be a faithful, joyful subject of the Kingdom of Heaven. I will --very publicly --be about my Father's business in such a way others can't resist! 

So, what about those cares and burdens, those plate glass windows? Need I remind you, when Jesus began preaching His message, He was coming off a forty-day fast in a desolate place where the enemy besieged Him, He'd just heard His cousin and friend, John the Baptist, was in prison, and He'd moved away from home. Hunger. Loneliness. Grief. Homesickness. Uncertainty. Who knows what burdens He carried! And yet, He didn't abdicate His message or His faith. Well, He was God. Yes, and He was man; the firstfruits of those who are His. That's why thinking is the initial step in Jesus' message and what should be our message to the world. Change your thinking; we have access to life in the Kingdom of Heaven right now! Our thinking determines whether we will or will not take part in Kingdom business. What we believe is the foundation for our experience.  

We have a tremendous reason to celebrate! Join the party: it's just begun!