Welcome to Saturday!

Years ago, I wrecked my car. Smashed it right into a telephone pole. I'd only had it a few months. It was really all I had to my name at that point and, truthfully, I was one step away from living in that car. But, I'd been to a barn party, had too much to drink, and lost it on a winding back road. I managed to get a ride to a police station where I reported the accident (that was an interesting conversation) and had someone take me to my ex-husband's house. He wasn't home, and I let myself in. I crashed for the night, and woke up the next morning with a "did that really happen?" wonderment. I recall it as though it was yesterday. The grey light of dawn in the windows and, except for the morning song of vigilant birds, the heaviness of silence. Waking in a place that was familiar, but no longer comfortable. Knowing how bad this all was, but having no idea where to begin fixing it. Trying to figure out at what point things had gone from a typical night with friends to aloneness and nothingness. Rationalizing as we all do in trouble -- "If only I hadn't..." -- as if somehow with our wishes or regret we can erase an outcome.

I imagine the disciples waking the morning after Christ's crucifixion with a similar feelings. One moment they were celebrating Passover with their Friend, the next moment He was gone. One moment they were waiting for their Teacher to return from prayer -- maybe asking one another, "Are you as tired as I am? How does He keep going like this?" -- the next moment He was being dragged away before their eyes. One moment they were safe, a band of brothers with their Master at the helm, the next moment they were scattered, in hiding, with no one to lead them. One moment they were hoping in this Messiah, the promises of a new kingdom, the next moment...

Welcome to Saturday. This is where we are. All of us live between Christ's death-burial-resurrection-ascension, and His return. There are choices to be made and things to sort out. We are at a point where we can keep our eye on the past. We can think to ourselves, "It's been two thousand years and nothing has happened! It's a great story, but does it bear any relevance for us today?" Don't think for a minute those disciples didn't doubt everything. We can continue to keep our eyes fixed on the promise. We can say to ourselves, "Things will be different when Jesus returns; all of this evil will end. I can really do with some peace and rest." And there's nothing wrong with looking to the promise fulfilled; I'm sure some of the disciples wished it could all just end, that they could simply be taken out of this evil and unjust world. But it is Saturday, and God doesn't waste any time.

This is the day, the time, given to us by a God who wants to include us in His plan, who wants us to know the benefit and blessing of working for Him, who gains even greater glory by restoring sinful, broken people and using them to do miraculous things. A God who demonstrates to us His faithfulness each and every time we have the privilege of witnessing His work. This is Saturday. Without Friday, there'd be no Saturday; without Sunday, Saturday would have no point. But we are here, and it is because of the Saturdays of others -- others caught between the promise and perfection, others who lived and worked in circumstances marked with pain for the sake of the glory (Heb. 11:1-12:2), others who served humbly despite never seeing fulfillment with an earthly understanding (but something much more glorious), that we can be assured God is at work. Even on Saturday.

Good Friday: Getting Back to Basics

I post a lot on here about my journey and the lessons I have learned along the way. I try to use my experiences -- the good, the bad, and the ugly -- to bring it all back to Jesus and demonstrate His grace and His worth. But, this is a new chapter in the journey and, at least for the moment, I'm looking to get back to basics. So, today, no parables, no veiled references -- nothing but the facts, as they say. And what better day than Good Friday!

"For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures."

-1 Corinthians 15:3-4 (ESV)

First importance. The work of Christ at the cross was not Plan B. And there is no other. God is omniscient, all knowing; He knew what His beloved creation would do before He ever spoke it into existence. He was looking to do a perfect work and to demonstrate His character as He does with all He allows or brings to fruition. It is of first importance because Christ's death and resurrection is the primary need of every being ever created. Ask a man if he needs to breathe, and he should answer in the affirmative. Ask him if he needs God, and who knows what you will get. But, even more foolish than that man denying his need for breath, is that man denying his need for Christ. We are all created beings, created by an infinite and wonderful God. The presence of sin -- invited in by Adam and Eve, and inherited and befriended by each of us thereafter -- caused a severance, a disjuncture between mankind and who we were created to be, between mankind and the shalom God gave us; our relationships with one another were fractured, our physical and mental health was torn away from the wholeness in which we were created, and most importantly, our relationship with God was completely and irreparably broken -- except for God's grace and immense love for us, His desire to be in relationship with us again, and His obedient, perfect Son. But for Jesus Christ, there is no other way to be in right standing with God, and to be who He created us to be. Like a fish out of water, or the man who refuses to breathe, we will die. The penalty for sin is death. Agreeing or disagreeing doesn't change that; truth, whether it is accepted or not, is still truth.

Jesus took our penalty; Jesus became a curse for us so that we might live forever in a perfect way -- in relationship with our Creator. That's what celebrating Good Friday is all about. And that's why it is good. What Jesus did that day makes it possible for all of us to know God and have His Holy Spirit change us. We can, because of Christ's selfless work, have love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. And we can use those gifts to change a world still broken and headed for death. It isn't easy, I won't delude you, but that's why we have the Holy Spirit, that's why we read the Bible and pray, that's why we go to church and fellowship with others who will disciple us and hold us accountable. Choosing this life is not some moment in time that covers our butts on Judgment Day; choosing this life is a choice for an eternal (Christ-like) way of living. Choosing to follow Jesus is to accept His work and live our lives as though all He promises is true. Becoming a Christian (literally "little Christ") is not trying to obey a list of rules and live a certain way for the mere practice of it; becoming a Christian is falling in love with One who has deliberately created us, who has an incredible plan for us, who gave His all to make sure we could be who we were designed to be, who loves us beyond anything human beings can imagine, who is mighty and sovereign, whose very laws of existence require sin to be punished, but whose grace has provided a way that punishment doesn't have to be received by us.

Contrary to any belief, popular or otherwise, time (if it can be called that) goes on forever. The choice is whether we will live in relationship with God, a relationship that is whole because of the blood of Christ shed at the cross and the wrath poured out on Him which is sufficient for any legal obligation, or whether we will go it alone. We will choose whether we recognize, esteem, and hold in highest gratitude Christ's substitutionary work, or whether we will ignore it and suffer the consequences. We will live as if we have been made new and filled with God's Holy Spirit, or we will remain the same. We will look toward a day when we will be united with Jesus, face to face, as His resurrection assures us, or we will look forward to nothing more than our next vacation, or family gathering, or anything that brings immediate satisfaction in this world. 

I urge you today, talk to God. Acknowledge your need for a relationship with Him and your animosity and failure as a sinner, toward God and His laws. Acknowledge the gracious and sufficient gift of salvation purchased for you by Jesus at the cross. Ask Him to be of first importance in your life and grow in your heart a love so deep for Him, it overflows boldly, bravely, generously and faithfully in your life. Ask Him to make you into the person He designed you to be, and to guide you along the path as you work in concert with Him to that goal. Know that, although our love is for the Giver and not the gift, your reward will be great in heaven.

Blessings to you, and celebrate this very Good Friday!

Walking Out One Last Time

I have been keeping a secret, and it's the reason I haven't posted anything here for awhile. It's a "secret" that, while I have not hesitated to exuberantly announce it to anyone I meet, I have not wished to discuss it here. It has been the preoccupation of almost every day for the last several months and, had I posted anything, I feared it would come tumbling out at any given time. It is such a multi-faceted, open-ended move, there is no discussing it with justice in a single forum. I pray it will evolve and unfold for quite a bit of time to come, and I welcome you to stop back and discover God's continued goodness and faithfulness along with me. But, in the meantime, the short story is,

I have retired from my paying gig. 

After more than thirty years in a place I didn't plan to stay longer than a year or so, it's over. And I'm not sorry. I have been waiting for this; I have been praying for this. And one afternoon, as I walked to the parking lot, I knew the time had come.

In April 1989, I began working at United Parcel Service (as it was named then). I enjoyed the job; I enjoyed my coworkers; I was privileged to be surrounded by true professionals. Few people could imagine such a level of partnership and mutual respect that existed from top to bottom; to be an employee in any capacity, was to be a valued member of the ranks for life. But, knowing I'd stay, that this would be the bulk of my adult life -- I didn't. And yet, when it comes to leaving such a place, I know it is time. Perhaps, because years ago, I was not looking to settle into a thirty-plus year career; recently, however, I have been looking to move on. 

As you can imagine, in such a significant amount of time, in a career that has spanned multiple shifts and multiple departments, I have known, worked alongside, and developed friendships with some pretty wonderful people. Some are dedicated professionals, and some are dedicated to being professional at a steady job. Some of the folks I've met have been smitten with me, and I with them; others will be happy to see me go, and I will, quite frankly, be relieved to no longer interact professionally or personally. The company itself has changed dramatically, and I can't say I endorse its transformation; but, I would be wrong if I did not acknowledge it has meant something, it has taught me a great deal, it has prepared me for other areas of leadership, and it has certainly provided for my family and me in ways few other jobs could. I am grateful.

All of this to say, if you are a regular reader, thank you. Be prepared for some pretty cool stuff to come. God has set me aside for a purpose, and I have been gifted with a pretty significant portion of my days and weeks to work in that purpose. If you are a former coworker or UPS partner, thanks for the ride. I hope you'll pop in once in awhile and see what God and I are up to; but if not, know you have been a special part of my life. Thanks for your words of encouragement, our moments of commiseration, your professionalism, the pen you loaned me to fill out my timesheet that day, the zoo passes, the flowers and chocolates and vending machine "birthday cake", the aggravation which drove me to praying for both of us, the lack of training which caused me to develop my own strengths, the hours of going over and above to meet challenges, the laughs, the hugs, the tears, the cold we passed back and forth for six weeks, the extra drivers, the mulligans on days I didn't have my head in the game, the movie recommendations, the tmi, the invitations, the baby shower, the promotion, the directions, the precious moments in life we have shared. May God bless each and every one of you with an insight to His grace and a desire to know Him and His love for you.

Just One Good Day

I remember thinking to myself, "Just one day. I just want one good day. No eye rolls or sucking teeth. No emails chewing me out for something someone else did. Just a simple, go to work, come home, get to bed on time kind of day." I was sure those days existed. I was almost positive my neighbors got more than their share; I was only asking for one. Life can be tough. And it seems particularly tough on God's own people. We've all been there: the final car payment clears and the washing machine walks off the job; you recover from pneumonia and your child gets a concussion playing ball; a week later, you're laid off. It seems never to stop. And you begin to wonder if God is paying attention, or if He is really who He says He is. How many fathers torment their children this way? Oh, you may not wonder it aloud, you may not even admit to yourself that you think it; but, somewhere, deep down, in those moments of fear and fatigue and frustration, you think how much easier life would be if you were "free." Life might be a bit less messy if so much wasn't expected of me. What if you could just "do you" like the rest of the world recommends? What if you could sit on the curb with every other down-n-outer, complaining and loathing fate, expecting nothing and, thereby removing all disappointment from your life? What if you didn't have to do everything to the glory of God? What if you could remain ignorant of sin or remain as a baby in your walk with Jesus? What is with the constant grooming, challenging, sharpening of iron, learning and discipline that is part and parcel of being a Christian?

Let me assure you, it is entirely God's fault. I have heard spiritual advisors talk about the "fallen world" in which we live -- and we do. "Well, sin entered the world, and with sin, a curse for all of creation. Genesis 3, clearly says Satan will harass us; we will have sorrow and pain; our relationships will be broken; we will work and sweat and strain and die. This world is fallen." And all of that is true, but the explanation can't stop there! If God is infinitely powerful, if God is sovereign over all, if God is eternal and unchanging, if God loves His people with an everlasting love, why isn't He doing something about this? In John 16:33, Jesus warns us we will have trouble in this world, but He has overcome this world. If you had a friend who was having a ridiculously tough time of it, and you had the means to bail them out, wouldn't you do all you could to remove them from the situation, or remove the situation from them? Jesus considers our relationship with Him to be one of friendship. So where is our Friend when we've had just about all we can take of this fallen world, its drama and pitfalls, demands and imperfections?

Getting back to God's culpability, He is 100%, without a doubt, irrefutably, precisely who His Word says He is. Yes, the world is fallen, yes, Satan is always looking to destroy our faith and claim lives for his glory, but in order for it to come to fruition, God must allow it. Let me say that again: God must allow it. All created beings -- and Satan is one -- answer to God. The only uncreated being is God Himself. Every narwhal, each Law of Thermodynamics, every cell, every whim is under the absolute authority of the Almighty God. Nothing escapes His permission or attention. All of creation is free to make choices which do not align with His character or His will for us, yet He allows this. While the last thing He wants, with regard to His immediate will, is for our children to be ill, or our church leaders to conduct themselves sinfully, or our jobs to be phased out, or global pandemic, or immorality and murder to be legalized within our nation, He sometimes allows it. Why? What kind of Friend is that? The kind of Friend who has the power to use what we believe is useless, and move that which we consider immoveable. He is the kind of Friend who sees the beginning from the end, and has an immense and glorious plan to redeem every tear we shed. He is the Friend who has all knowledge about all things, including who we will one day be as we stand in His presence, fully sanctified. And He is the Friend who loves us more than any other ever could. 

Let me leave you with this analogy. Your spouse is extremely ill and is awaiting surgery. The doctor tells you both, under no circumstances should you or your spouse risk exposure to any communicable diseases; it's best you both remain at home until after the surgery and recovery. Your spouse has heard a famous artist is coming to the local coffee house days before surgery. It will be mobbed with people, but this artist is, far and away, you and your spouse's favorite. You dream how wonderful it would be if you both could attend. "Just head on over there and grab an autograph," your spouse begs. "I'm not even asking you take me; just do this one thing. You know you want to." And you do want it. For yourself. For your spouse. But, you know the facts, you know the risks, you value your spouse's life greatly. While refusal might make the home scene a little rough for a bit, refusal will not jeopardize your spouse's well-being. Compliance might ease tension and make things appear to run smoothly, but compliance will do both of you the greatest disservice anyone could ever do. Are you the friend who acquiesces to the immediate appeal for satisfaction, or are you the friend who thinks long term? If you want the best for your spouse, if you want your spouse to live in optimal health, you will not give in to what is easiest, or most popular, or most appealing. You will be the friend who stays by your spouse even when your spouse is displeased with the situation, even when your spouse cannot appreciate you or your choices. You will not allow just one good day at the expense of sharing many of your best days together in the future.