2AM Troubles

Just a couple months ago I was preparing for a trip, a few hours of driving by myself. I've done longer. I've done the same drive with my aging mother and/or children in tow. I've done others while sick and in much worse weather. But. In the middle of the night, hours before I was scheduled to leave, the voice came. "You can't do this." My first reaction was shock at how silly that sounded. My second was to ask, "Are You telling me I shouldn't?" I'm not an alarmist. My mind doesn't immediately think God is trying to protect me from some terrible danger or, likewise, assume the enemy is attempting to keep me from something wonderful along the way. But have I been known to allow things like this to keep me staring at the ceiling for the next several hours? Sure, I've done it. I know the enemy wants to steal the King's glory by derailing and distracting His subjects. Conversely, I know God speaks to our hearts for His glory and our good. But how is one to figure which is which at 2 AM?   

As believers in Jesus Christ, we have wisdom. You might call it discernment. Either way, I'm not talking about that revelation that warns us the person speaking is a fraud or assists us in knowing specifically how to pray for a situation. That's a bit different. This is the wisdom of knowing the Scriptures and having walked with the Lord through flood and fire, through joy and abundance. This is the revelation that comes as we pray and spend time in quiet with the Lord. It is the steps we take at 2 in the afternoon that determine how we navigate the thoughts at 2 AM. It is the place we sit on Sunday morning that determines whether we will lie awake in bed on Tuesday night. It is our intake of God's Word each day that keeps us in peace each night. And it's a process. Gaining wisdom is not a take two aspirin and call me in the morning remedy for confusion. Wisdom increases as we increase our nearness to the One who is Wisdom. You might even say wisdom is improved hearing; hearing the Shepherd's voice, recognizing it as such, and following as He leads. It's not necessarily a weapon forged of logic and determination; we're not rationalizing here --Is Satan trying to rob me of my peace? Is God waking me to pray? Is this the lime tortilla chips I ate before bed? Wisdom comes less from thinking and more from knowing The King. And under no circumstances should it result in discussion with the enemy! 

So, at 2 AM, I didn't throw pillows at the enemy from across the room. I didn't review my resume' of every long-distance drive. I didn't wake my husband, call my daughter, check the forecast, kick the tires, or even take another melatonin. By God's grace, I directed my response to Him; and I believe that made all the difference. Within minutes, I dropped back off to sleep and slept soundly until morning. Something that could have kept me wide-eyed for hours, on a night when I definitely wanted to rest well, was overthrown. Insert victory dance here. (Not for me, mind you, but for the Holy Spirit who is constantly at work in me!) Knowing God and His Word, trusting in His provision for and hand on my life, and directing all questions and concerns to Him and Him alone, is the best remedy for those late night, early morning battles. 

That, and skipping the lime tortilla chips before bed.