Heart Renovations

As I write, Luci is curled on her bed nearby, snoring and catching up on much needed sleep. The washer and dryer are humming along in the next room. I have the luxury of lighting a candle and spending some quiet moments with Jesus, doing one of the things I love most: writing about Him. A day ago, my office was off limits, laundry was piling up, and Luci was nervously chasing after a bevy of excited children. One of our daughters and her children were here for the weekend. An unexpected and absolutely delightful visit! But our home, as great as the square footage may be, does not perfectly meet the needs of a large group of active, age-diverse children and adults. It's been a bit chaotic and cramped --not how Scott and I have always perceived our home. In moments of loss, our house has appeared mockingly large. In seasons of quiet, it has seemed grave-like. When we were caring for my delicate mother, I detected hazards everywhere --some were revealed unexpectedly! And when our young man joined us, I was struck by our home's formality and propriety. Great for adults, but is this welcoming to a child? Does his room meet 3rd grader criteria? Is it functional and fun? Will he feel at home? Fast forward to today. This is our home. This is his home. And, while he sometimes says he too wishes we had a bigger house, our son feels at home here. Did we do a huge renovation? Comfier furniture, some brighter colors or updated technology? Nope. We are learning that "home" has so much more to do with the overflow of our hearts. By allowing the Holy Spirit to transform them, make them softer and safer, we are building a home for a child who, less than two years ago, was a stranger. 

If I'm being totally transparent, when our young man first joined us, I was tense when he was out of my sight. As much as I wanted to treat him like family, he was still a boy I did not know milling about our home. What's he doing? Why is he doing that? Who said he could use this? This was our home. These were our things. He had not yet become part of ours. But exploring our home, exploring our lives, and even, testing our boundaries (and our meddle) was the way to him becoming part of ours. If our home seemed formal and proper (maybe more like rigid and detached --transparency, right?) it might benefit all parties to look at our hearts. We invited this child into our lives. We promised him the belonging he needed. The burden of relationship was on us. And our reaction as he began making himself at home exposed the areas we had not yet relinquished. Until we renovated our hearts to be grace-filled, safe places for him to know and be known, our home would not be suitable, regardless the size or decor.   

This is the grace behind God-designed, God-implemented, and God-maintained adoption. He desires us to be joined to Him, not simply as lackies or personal valets; not even exclusively as missionaries and ambassadors of His goodness. God sent His only begotten Son that we should be forgiven, receiving eternal life, and being joined with Him, sons and daughters of the Most High God. He places the burden of relationship on Himself, making a way, calling us, drawing us to Himself with His kindness, and purposefully milling about the moments of our lives. He reveals Himself to us through Scriptures and the revelation of the Word Incarnate, His Son Jesus Christ who lived a perfect life. He wants to be intimately acquainted with us and our things: our desires, our fears, our failures. He wants to "make Himself at home" in our lives. He awaits our honesty. His Spirit works in us to break down walls that we might know the joy and prosperity of being intimate with Him. He begins touching those things we have convinced ourselves do not belong to anyone but us. What are You doing? Why are You doing that? Who said You could use this? He is moving and touching our schedules, our priorities, our desires so that we might see where we need to do some renovations, where the home of our hearts is unwelcoming and inimical to relationship. He has created a grace-filled, safe place --His presence --where we can reveal ourselves to Him, be transparent. He allows us to know Him and longs for us to be known by Him, making our hearts inhabited by His Spirit a welcoming home.