Time for Your Check-Up

A couple months ago, I had surgery to prepare for a dental implant. It was a process I had put off for almost thirty years. Because of my procrastination, it could have been so much worse; because of God's grace, I was spared the pain, the trouble, and the cost. I was finally able to get moving by assuring myself it was three simple visits: the initial surgery, a follow-up exam to prepare the site for the cap, and a trip to my dentist for the cap. One. Two. Three. And done. Turns out I was mistaken. There have been multiple exams afterward. The follow-up. The follow-up to the follow-up. The pre-preparation visit. My next visit should be the site prep. Each of the visits after the surgery has lasted less time than it takes me to drive to the surgeon's office. Each visit after the surgery has consisted of a few "uh-huhs," "okays," and an "Alright, we'll see ya back in..." After finding out there was a follow-up, I was discouraged. After finding there was a follow-up to the follow-up, I was annoyed. On the day of the pre-preparation visit, I almost canceled; this process was tedious and I wanted it over. 

If we are "doing it right," seasons in our walk with the Lord can seem the same way. Ephesians 5:15, tells us to "walk circumspectly." Our word circumspectly comes from Latin: circum- "around", and specere, "to look at" (think spectacles). We should be re-examining the past, evaluating our thoughts and actions today, all with an eye to bringing glory to God for generations to come. But, sometimes those examinations can become wearisome, as wearisome as some of the seasons we go through. Sometimes it seems as though we are hashing and rehashing the same feelings, issues, behaviors, and ideas. The goals we set are still there, still unreached. Our prayer list never seems to get any shorter. The things we were struggling with way back when seem to linger still today. We think if we could just get a firm footing and procure some sort of stability we could manage to do something truly worthwhile for the kingdom. But with every examination, the results are still the same: a few "uh-huhs," some "okays," and an "Alright, we'll see ya back in..." Status quo. 

God is the Great Physician. He knows what He's doing. Sometimes these examinations may seem like a waste of time. We feel healed. We feel ready for the next step. We don't want to review and rehash and re-evaluate only to walk out empty-handed. We want to believe God is doing something in us. And He is. Despite what we may or may not feel, God has promised to continue what He started unto completion. He wastes nothing and can use anything. Our growth or the healing in our situations is not dependent upon how we feel. Just because we haven't met our goals does not mean we haven't met God's goals. Just because our situation is as unstable or uncertain as it was last year does not mean we have remained the same. Just because our progress doesn't meet our standards doesn't mean it hasn't met God's. What is important is a circumspect walk, constantly seeking to grow, to have our hearts laid bare before the Holy Spirit that He might do His work in His way in His time.