So That Only Joy Remains

The first full week of work after staycation. Ugh! I'm exhausted! The week was filled with things to do which, sadly, put me behind in my personal Bible study. Right now, for instance, I am still playing catch-up with some of my Easter meditations -- Matthew 28, to be specific.

Matthew records what the women witnessed as they came to the place where they expected Jesus to be entombed: fainting guards, a spectacularly arrayed angel (When you're staycationing in sweats, you're dressed -- sort of. When you're glowing brilliant alabaster, you're arrayed, by the way.) and a very empty tomb. The angel gives them the glorious news that Jesus is risen as He promised, and urges them to verify -- make absolutely certain of -- his message, before they go and tell the others. The angel also tells them, Jesus will meet them and the rest of the disciples in Galilee -- some 120 miles away, from what I read. "There you will see Him," the messenger promises. Matthew doesn't tell us whether the women did take a peek in the tomb or not, but two of the other Gospel writers do. Matthew simply says, "they went out quickly from the tomb with fear and great joy, and ran to bring His disciples word." They went quickly! They set off running! With a mixture of fear and great joy. 

Many times I have been overcome with joy as I've read or worshiped. "That is just so cool! Lord, that hit me right where it counts. I know I needed to hear that. Thank You for that word of encouragement (or wisdom, or reprimand, or whatever He sent that I may not have wanted but certainly needed). I can't wait to tell the others what You've done! I can't wait to get started on that project!" Joy! Joy! Joy! I am bold. I am convinced. I am filled with joy! But then it happens. Night falls, or days pass, or I head off to work, or I throw in a load of laundry -- whatever -- but, there's some sort of delay, and I don't hurry right off, or maybe I can't hurry right off to share or get started, and fear begins to speak. "Are you sure you heard that right? Why would He say that to you? You know you're not capable. You know you're just a nobody. Doesn't everybody think what they've experienced is special? I'm pretty sure every failure was built upon someone thinking they knew something big. Don't you remember the last time you thought you heard that? I would think you'd have learned by now..." And on and on it speaks. Before I know it, joy has gone and only fear remains.

It's sort of ironic, because, in the very next verse (v. 9), Matthew tells us that as the women were heading to tell the disciples Jesus was alive and planning to meet with them, Jesus appeared before them. Jesus met these women as they were going to deliver the promise of their meeting! Why? Seems a bit redundant. Well, maybe Jesus was just as excited to see them as they were to see Him. Maybe that angel had a history of getting messages a little confused. (I don't think so.) Or, maybe, time had passed and fear had begun to speak. "Did we really see that? Mary, no offense, but do you think the disciples will assume the evil spirits have come back? And what about you, Mary? You remember last week when you called Joses, by James's name instead? They teased you for days that you were starting to lose it. I know Jesus never made us feel like secondhand citizens, but what will Peter say? Sometimes he can be so harsh. Didn't I say we should have brought one of the men to help us with the stone? He could have verified our story." Fear. And the absence of joy. 

Jesus, I believe, wasn't about to stand back and allow them to allow fear to steal their joy. (That's right, we have to allow fear to speak to us and extinguish our fire.) He made an appearance and repeated the message to keep these women on track. He wanted them to be sure they saw what they saw, heard what they heard, and, as a result, followed through. God's message through the angel was to check the tomb and be sure He wasn't there. Jesus' message to the women was to know what they'd witnessed was real, and not let fear keep them from obedience. And not just obedience, but evangelizing! I don't know about you, but more than once, I've kept my mouth shut about Christ for fear I'd be thought nutty or annoying. Sure, obedience is important, but when fear keeps us from the obedience of proclaiming Jesus, it is a powerful tool in the hands of the devil. It not only keeps us believing a lie, but keeps others from the truth as well. But we have an all-knowing, loving Friend in Jesus who knows what we need when we need it, and will step in to deliver us from anything that will harm us. Including joy-stealing fear.