Third Degree Burns Won't Change Your Enemies

Since we've become such an internet-centric society, the power of a positive review can be extraordinary. So can the power of a terrible one. Just a couple months ago we got ripped off. Someone who came to us highly recommended, who had one -- just one -- questionable review went to work for us and failed to do the job. Nothing subjective about it. No miscommunication. This person simply didn't listen, didn't take the job seriously, and failed to do what they were paid to do. The cost was beyond calculation. A friend suggested I Yelp a terrible review, but something told me I shouldn't. A day or so later, Scott wondered aloud if this person was the least bit remorseful, if maybe, they would consider returning at least a portion of what they stole. That was confirmation: if I write that scathing review, I remove an opportunity for this person to do the right thing. 

One of those "difficult" passages of Scripture is Proverbs 25:21-22:

"If your enemy is hungry, give him bread to eat;

And if he is thirsty, give him water to drink;

For so you will heap coals of fire on his head,

And the Lord will reward you."

What is that whole "burning coals" thing all about? Some study Bibles suggest acts of kindness will cause enemies to feel guilty for their bad attitudes and unkind actions toward you, and they will repent and seek forgiveness. That's good, right? We want others to repent when necessary -- especially when those who don't know Jesus repent for all they've done, not just the ways they've wronged us. But is that really what this verse is talking about?

In Romans 12:14-21, Paul instructs us in the way to win over our enemies using kindness. He reiterates the proverb about burning coals. While we need to persist in kindness toward everyone, even our enemies, and Paul's words can encourage us in that obedience, we cannot count on a Hallmark ending each and every time. We are all given free will, and some people, no matter how kind we are, will never even notice much less be won over. Besides, isn't doing kind things strictly for the purpose of changing the "bad person" a bit judgmental and formulaic? Aren't we to be kind because we have been changed? Paul and the writer of Proverbs is saying just that. 

In ancient Israel, coal was important for heating and cooking. A household bereft of fuel was a household in peril; but if a neighbor -- even an enemy -- was willing to share their fire, coals could be carried in a fire pan, likely on one's head, back to the household in need. What a blessing! These authors are not talking about some "holier than thou," "kill 'em with kindness" act, but an act of charity born out of the Holy Spirit's work in the heart of a believer. When Christians extend God's forgiveness and charity toward others, we give them the opportunity to not only stay warm or eat, but to do the right thing. We give them the opportunity to thank God for changing hearts and sending help. We give them the opportunity to know God's grace. We give them the opportunity to repent -- for the terrible things they've done to us, if necessary, but primarily for their sin against God. We point to the transforming power of the Holy Spirit simply by be being transformed ourselves, by walking out that changed life. 

I wanted this person to work for us; I wanted to see what they are capable of -- I believe it's so much more. I want this person to not be satisfied with what they have done. I want them to know they have the potential to be better. I want them to know God will bless their repentance. But I won't be dishing out third degree burns to prove it.