Comfort in Relationships

A friend just asked for prayer because she is in the midst of a health crisis and she is fearful. I bring it up, because that type of fear is not something I normally experience. And maybe there's a reason for that.

Years ago, I'd been assigned to a department at work that handled breakages and spills -- sometimes hazardous material spills. A clean-up was required -- something smoking -- and I quickly removed it from the building in an effort to deal with it where it could not harm others. (It turned out to be some sort of sealant that had been activated by extremely high temperatures during transit.) Once the situation was neutralized, another employee walked up to me and said, "You're pretty fearless, aren't you?" When it comes to fire? broken glass? spiders and snakes? bodily harm? Yep! But if the situation had been a salon full of women urging me to get my nails done, or a subpoena demanding I testify in the trial of an estranged family member, or an encounter with one of my past "crushes", or some bit of nastiness threatening to force its way into or alter my "safe" little world...?

I was intensely afraid of honest relationships and confrontation. More accurately, I was afraid of how those kinds of things "always end" -- in abandonment. I never told others how I felt because I was afraid they would abandon me. I never shared the Gospel with anyone because I thought they would think I was some sort of freak, and abandon me. I never looked people in the eye or met trouble head on because I didn't want to be abandoned. Fear of abandonment governed everything I did: pleasing people, neglecting to set boundaries, running myself into the ground to do it all, gossiping and lying about my gossiping. Until I got to a point I couldn't take it any longer. I sought the help of a friend. A friend who taught me the importance of boundaries in a relationship, and showed me that being alone was not the worse thing in the world. When it came to navigating the stormy seas of life, this friend was fearless!

And now, this friend fears something of which I have no fear. And she has asked me to pray. And I am reminded that's what this life in Christ is all about. Hands and feet, not feet and feet. White and black, not black and black. Differences that serve whatever purpose God has for us; differences that, when we work together, can accomplish great things for the Kingdom; differences that complement one another, not divide.

"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as the sufferings of Christ abound in us, so our consolation also abounds through Christ." ~ 2 Corinthians 1:3-5

"Heavenly Father, 
Please be with J as she undergoes this procedure. Remove any fear and worry from her and allow her to rest well. She knows Your Son and she knows You will not leave her or forsake her. You are the Great Physician, the Designer and Craftsman of her body, and You are able to make everything that she faces work for her good and Your glory. I ask that You would send a special word or reminder to her, that it will be okay, that she is in Your care, and You are aware and in control of all that is taking place. Please give the doctor wisdom and a good night's rest; and if it is Your will, heal her today, right now, so this procedure would be completely unnecessary. We give You all the glory for Your answer to prayer. We give You praise for Your healing in our lives, and we worship Your majesty. Praise Your mighty name!
We pray in the name of Your Son, Jesus Christ our Lord, Amen."