Finish Well

I'd like to confess something to you today: getting things done is important to me. There is a certain euphoria in developing and beginning new projects, new books, new habits; but seeing those things through is important to me as well. Crossing that finish line, crossing those things off my list brings a sense of accomplishment and-- I'll be honest --worth. I feel as though I have left my mark as a human being. There are myriad problems with this, however; one of them being, the thrill I get from beginnings causes me to overplan and overcommit, and the satisfaction I get from completions causes me to rush through those things, stressed and striving all the way. Henry David Thoreau, in his book Walden, says:

He who distinguishes the true savor of his food can never be a glutton; he who does not cannot be otherwise.

It is the difference between consuming for the pleasure of it, for the experience or long-term (in some things, eternal) benefit that can be gained, versus consuming simply to consume. 

Take for instance, our quiet time with the Lord. I hope that's part of your day, everyday. When you close your Bible or turn off the worship music, is your heart full? Are you uplifted and feel ready for whatever comes your way? Wonderful. But, what happens when moments later your youngest is, once again, refusing to get dressed? What happens when that first person cuts you off in traffic? What happens when you arise from your knees and the cat knocks the cactus you've been nursing for weeks onto the new carpet? If your answer is not mercy, prayerfulness, patience, perhaps you've been consuming without truly savoring; perhaps you have been pushing your way recklessly to the finish line without understanding or paying attention to the purpose of the race. Ask me how I know. Our time with Jesus each day, throughout our day, is meant to prepare us. 

When Jesus retired to secluded places to pray, He was seeking intimacy with His Father-- with our Father. I've noticed through our years together, my husband and I have picked up mannerisms and expressions from one another; some of his quirks have become mine and vice versa. When he and I are through having breakfast together, I don't go about the rest of my day floating on a cloud, experiencing some sort of exhilaration because we've been together. In fact, the clearest way anyone could suspect we've spent time together is by watching me be me yet, seeing glimpses of Scott in who I am. Jesus prayed His disciples (that's all of us who follow Him) would be one as He and the Father are one. We become one with Jesus and one with each other by spending time together, by knowing one another's character and relating to each other based on that character. Choosing to imitate, to copy behavior, may get us to the finish line more quickly, but it's an outward modification. We'll have missed the deeper transformation, the change that comes from the heart and is reflected from the inside out. 

That's what our time with Jesus each day is about. We quietly, obediently, humbly, submissively seek His will in that time, surrendering leadership to Him, listening for His voice that we might take on His characteristics; not that we might simply feel like we're ready, but that we would truly be ready, armed and obedient. I pray that none of us crosses that finish line before we have been prepared to finish well. I pray that none of us gluts our way to fullness, but seeks the fullness that can only be found in God's presence, in God's time.